Dear Friends,
It is close to midnight and I can't sleep. Our mother died today. My mom died today. That seems so weird writing that...my mom is dead. How can that be? How can she no longer be a part of the world I live in? She practically willed herself to live until I got home, and that rebound surprised everyone. She lasted far longer than we thought possible and told me she loved me until she was no longer able to speak. Hospice told us that during the dying process, the dying person sometimes withdraws and limits their responses to just a few people or even one person. That person was my dad. She would not look at me or respond to me, just kind of slid her eyes over me. Even though I knew what was happening, it was still hard to not have her acknowledge me. That withdrawal from me changed as she was dying. When she was in so much pain and I was giving medicine to her, she would look at me as I told her everything was going to be ok. She watched me as I stroked her head and if I stopped, she let me know to start again just by looking at me. And then when she took her last breath and died, it was just the two of us, looking into each other's eyes.
Despite the heaviness of our loss, we received words of joy from Diana’s 4 year old granddaughter. When told that Nana was in heaven, she asked, “Is Nana all better now?” Yes, she’s all better. “Is she happy?” Yes, she’s very happy now. “Yippee, Yeah!", she shouted as she jumped up and down and clapped her hands. And I know that the joy of an innocent child is being multiplied by the angels in heaven, welcoming her home.
LaDonna
I would like to offer my condolences to you and your family. May the Good Lord give you patience and strength to get through the grieving process and may your mother rest peacefully.
ReplyDeletebest, nadia
My thoughts are with you, I'm so glad you were able to be with your mother in her last days. I'm sure they have been a mixture of many emotions, and there will be more to come. How special that the words of a child can burrow down to such a pure emotion as joy and thankfulness and help you find a peaceful path through your loss.
ReplyDeleteHugs Kathy
LaDonna and Diana, thoughts and prayers with you and your families now at yur time of loss.
ReplyDeleteLinda|C
Oh LaDonna and Diana, you knew it was coming but that doesn't make it any easier does it. But you have to comfort yourself with the knowledge that you were there for her when she needed you most, and also when your Dad needed you most. Her suffering is over now and thegrandbaby is right. And now the next difficult stage is here - we are all thinking of you and praying for you.
ReplyDeleteMy thoughts and prayers and with you both at this time xxxx
ReplyDeleteMy thoughts and prayers are with you and your family. I'm so sorry for your loss. I'm glad you were able to have these final days with her. Hugs.
ReplyDeleteLaDonna, Diana and family, you are in my thoughts and prayers. Hoping you find comfort in remembering your mother's life. Hugs!
ReplyDeleteI am so sorry to hear about your mom.
ReplyDeleteDear La Donna and Diana, I'm close to you and your family. You know that your mom will be forever in your hearts and in your life.
ReplyDeleteHugs
I'm sorry for your loss and this painful time for you all.
ReplyDeleteI am sorry to hear about the loss of your mother. I know she had been very sick. It is at times like this that we hold our family and friends close. Please know that you and your family are in my thought and prayers.
ReplyDeleteMy deepest condolences to both of you and your families. It is never an easy time, but such a powerful thing that you were able to be there and share so much in her final days. Only a very special person and relationship leaves such a large hole in your life....you are fortunnate to have had a relationship like that.
ReplyDeleteI'm so sorry for your loss, LaDonna and Diana. I'm so glad you were able to be there. Yes, although you know she is better off now, that does little to diminish your pain. You are in my prayers.
ReplyDeleteDear LaDonna and Diana, I am saddened to hear of your mothers passing. You can take solitude in knowing she is no longer in pain. Such a wonderful understanding from a 4 year old. You and your familys are in my thoughts and prayers. Hugs, Cathy
ReplyDeleteLaDonna, Diane and all your family,
ReplyDeleteMy deepest condolences. My prayers are that you will be at complete peace and all things will go by easily and with out trial. Oh, that we could be like children! Blessings
I am glad that you had a chance to be together at the end. My mom passed away before I got there. May God be with you.
ReplyDeleteLaDonna and Diana, My heart cries with you over the loss of your mom. I have been where you are today and your post so eloquently describes the pain and the joy of losing someome so close. You will treasures these memories forever, even though the pain is so great and almost unbearable today. My thoughts and prayers are with you and your family.
ReplyDeleteBig hug, LaDonna and Diana....
ReplyDelete-Sherry
www.izzyandmommy.blogspot.com
LaDonna, Diana and families,
ReplyDeleteThe 4yr old sweetness put it in a nutshell. Your mom/Nana is pain free, happy and flying with the angels. For those of us left behind it is a time of loss and figuring out how to fill the void that loved one leaves. I lost my mother 7 yrs ago and some voids you never can fill, but as time goes by you will replace some with good memories, her mother bear love for each of you, and you will be able to smile more and cry less.
May God fill you with His strength and peace.
Love and many hugs, Deborah
I never know what words to say because I remember clearly what a profound and overwhelming moment this is for you. I just wanted to say that we're here for you in the quilting community, holding you two close in our hearts right now.
ReplyDeleteDear LaDonna and Diana, I am so sorry to hear of your mother passing. Diana's grandaughter response was so beautiful and such a lesson for all of us to remember. What a blessing that you were able to spend her last moments with her. Hope your Dad is doing well. My heart and prayers go out to you both and your families.
ReplyDeleteMy heartfelt condolences to you both.
ReplyDeleteOh LaDonna and Diana I am so sorry for your loss. I know how hard it is. Just know that you are in my thoughts and in my prayers. My you have happy memories of your sweet mom.
ReplyDeleteHugs
donna
My condolences to your also. I have tears in my eyes as I have just finished reading your moving post. Such precious memories of your mother's bravery in her last days.
ReplyDeleteDeb
I'm so sorry for your loss. I bet your being there for your Mom made the last days of her life that much better.
ReplyDeleteJudy
Keeping you both in my prayers through this tough time. Lean on each other...that's what sisters are for. Hugs.
ReplyDeleteDorothy
I'm so sorry for your loss, you and your families will be in my thoughts.
ReplyDeleteI am so sorry for your loss! I know she is in the comfort of God's love as well as your family and I will keep your family in my prayers.
ReplyDeleteI am so sorry for your loss. It is hard to lose loved ones. You are in my prayers today.
ReplyDelete